Prompt:
Caribou Season at the Lodge
Genre: Surreal Horror
JT knew something wasn't right from the moment they'd pulled up to the lodge. It looked exactly as it had every autumn of his life—the cedar shingles silvered with age, the porch sagging gently under weight of winters past—but the air felt thicker, somehow, as if the woods had leaned in closer, waiting. He thought maybe he was just tired. Maybe it was nothing more than the long drive north, cramped in the back of the truck beside his older brother Mike -- and a stack of rifles wrapped in oily canvas. Still, the feeling lingered.
The first caribou they found that season hadn't bolted. It had just watched, ears flicking lazily, waiting for the shot. JT had felt a crawling in his gut watching it die, noticing how it fell with a quiet dignity—as though it had wanted nothing more. Nobody else seemed to find it odd, or at least they didn't say so. JT kept his mouth shut. Always safer that way.
Then there was the moment in the clearing. JT had fallen behind, fumbling with bootlaces stiff from the cold, and by the time he'd caught up with his father and brother, they'd already stopped. JT slowed instinctively, ducking behind a tangle of brush, staring out into the open space where a massive buck stood utterly still, chest rising and falling in slow, deep breaths. The animal looked…wrong, somehow. Maybe it was the eyes—dark and flat, calm in a way that made JT's neck prickle. Or maybe it was something deeper, something in the way the buck stood close enough for his father to reach out and touch it.
JT watched as his father raised a trembling hand toward the animal's muzzle. His father's face had a strange expression, eyes too bright, lips parted slightly, like he was on the verge of whispering something—a secret, maybe. The rifle hung uselessly at his side, forgotten. Mike had the same dazed look in his eyes. JT's breath stopped short, his mind suddenly shouting at him to look away, turn around, just run—but he couldn't move.
And then, as suddenly as it had begun, it was over. The buck shivered, startled by something unseen, and disappeared into the brush without so much as a sound. The two of them looked around, confused, seemingly surprised to find themselves where they stood. JT stayed hidden, breathing shallowly, fear mingling with a confused sense of shame. His father had failed to take the shot. To even think about mentioning what he'd seen would have felt like betrayal—or something worse.
JT waited until the others moved on before stepping out from cover. He stared into the empty clearing for a long, uneasy moment, wondering if anything had really happened at all, or if he was losing his grip. Maybe the woods were finally getting into his head.
Writing Instructions:
Continue with the next chapter of the story, maintaining a style reminiscent of Stephen King—grounded realism blended seamlessly with unsettling surrealism. The atmosphere should convey subtle dread, isolation, and psychological ambiguity. JT's perspective is crucial, yet he is an unreliable narrator, caught in uncertainty about what he's perceiving. Establish an undertone of creeping dread, establishing the isolation of JT's perspective, which he largely keeps to himself. Incorporate some dialogue. Build tension towards a payoff. 1000 words.
Model Output:
# Chapter Two: The Guide's Warning
The lodge felt smaller at night. JT lay in the top bunk, listening to Mike's breathing below—steady, unbothered—and tried to convince himself that everything was fine. The wood stove ticked as it cooled. Outside, something moved through the underbrush, branches crackling under weight. Probably just a fox. Or a raccoon. He told himself this three times before sleep finally came.
Morning brought fog so thick JT could barely see the truck from the porch steps. His father was already up, nursing coffee that steamed like a signal fire in the gray dawn. The old man looked tired, purple crescents beneath his eyes, but when he noticed JT watching, he straightened up and forced a grin.
"Big day," his father said. "Tommy's meeting us at the north ridge. Says there's a whole herd moving through."
Tommy Whitehorse had guided them for years, a wiry man in his sixties who knew these woods the way other men knew their own living rooms. He could track a caribou through stone if he had to, and he had stories for every mile of trail—some funny, some strange, all of them told with the easy confidence of a man who belonged here in a way JT's family never quite would.
But when Tommy's truck pulled up an hour later, the man who climbed out didn't look like himself. His face was drawn, eyes darting toward the tree line like he expected something to emerge from the fog. He barely nodded at JT's father, didn't crack a single joke, just stood there with his hands jammed deep in his jacket pockets.
"Tommy," JT's father said, clapping him on the shoulder. "Ready to show these boys how it's done?"
Tommy flinched at the touch. "Actually, John, I've been thinking. Maybe we should call it. Head back early this year."
The silence that followed felt heavy. Mike stopped loading the truck bed, turning to stare. JT's father's smile faltered, then hardened into something else—pride, maybe, or stubbornness.
"Call it? We just got here two days ago."
"I know, but—" Tommy glanced at the woods again, then back. "The season's off. Animals are acting strange. Wrong."
"We've had good luck so far," Mike said, but there was a question in his voice, like he was asking for reassurance.
Tommy's jaw worked. "That's what I mean. Too good. Too easy. They're not running like they should." He looked directly at JT's father now, and JT saw something in the guide's expression that made his stomach clench—fear, yes, but also a kind of resignation. "You should pack up. Leave before the moon's full. That's three days."
"Before the full moon?" JT's father laughed, but it came out wrong, too sharp. "What is this, a campfire story? Come on, Tommy. You're spoiling the boy." He jerked his chin toward JT, who felt his face flush hot.
"I'm not trying to spook anyone," Tommy said quietly. "I'm trying to help you. My grandfather used to say there are seasons when the woods take more than they give. When the caribou stop being prey and start being something else. Bait, maybe. Or witnesses." He shook his head. "I don't know. I just know you should go."
"Bait for what?" Mike asked.
Tommy didn't answer. He pulled an envelope from his pocket and pressed it into JT's father's hand. "That's your deposit back. I'm sorry, John. I can't take you out again. Not this year."
JT watched his father's face cycle through emotions—confusion, anger, embarrassment. Finally, he stuffed the envelope back at Tommy. "Keep it. We don't need a guide. We know these trails well enough."
"John—"
"We're fine, Tommy. Thanks for your concern." His father turned and walked back toward the lodge, shoulders rigid.
Tommy stood there a moment longer, looking at Mike, then at JT. His gaze lingered on JT, and something passed between them—an understanding, maybe, or a warning. "You see anything strange," Tommy said, voice low enough that Mike had to lean in to hear, "you get your family out. Don't wait. Don't try to understand it. Just go."
Then he climbed back in his truck and drove away, taillights swallowed by fog before he'd even reached the main road.
---
They went out anyway. Of course they did. JT's father wouldn't hear of leaving, not after Tommy's "superstitious nonsense," and Mike fell in line the way he always did. JT said nothing, though the guide's words rattled around in his skull like loose teeth.
*Bait. Witnesses.*
The north ridge was beautiful in a stark, lonely way—all granite outcroppings and stunted pines, the land falling away into valleys choked with morning mist. They spread out, JT taking the eastern flank while his father and brother worked the center. The plan was simple: push any game toward the clearing below, where they'd have clean shots.
JT moved through the trees carefully, rifle cradled in both arms, trying to focus on the hunt and not on the way the fog seemed to move against the wind. Trying not to think about the buck from yesterday, or his father's trembling hand reaching out to touch something wild and wrong.
He was so lost in thought that he almost walked right into it.
The caribou stood in his path, not ten feet away, head lowered. Blood matted the fur along its flank—a wound, maybe a day old, crawling with flies despite the cold. The animal should have been in shock, dying. Instead, it watched him with those same flat, knowing eyes.
And then it turned and walked away, limping but deliberate, pausing every few steps to look back.
Like it wanted him to follow.
JT's hands tightened on the rifle. Every instinct screamed at him to turn around, to find his father and brother and tell them they needed to leave *now*. But his feet were already moving, following the wounded caribou deeper into the woods, where the fog grew thick as wool and the trees leaned in close, waiting.
Judge Evaluation:
[Analysis]
This piece demonstrates strong adherence to the Stephen King-inspired surreal horror style requested, effectively maintaining the atmospheric dread and psychological ambiguity established in the first chapter. The writing successfully captures JT's perspective as an unreliable narrator caught between rational doubt and supernatural dread.
The introduction of Tommy Whitehorse as the guide provides an effective vehicle for exposition and tension escalation. His character feels authentic - a local with generational knowledge who recognizes something fundamentally wrong but struggles to articulate it. The dialogue feels natural and serves multiple purposes: character development, world-building, and tension creation. Tommy's cryptic warnings about "seasons when the woods take more than they give" and his references to bait and witnesses effectively deepen the mystery without over-explaining.
The family dynamics ring true, particularly the father's stubborn pride when challenged by Tommy's warnings, and Mike's tendency to follow his father's lead. JT's continued isolation - keeping his observations to himself - maintains consistency with his established character. The psychological realism of a teenage boy caught between family loyalty and growing dread feels authentic.
The pacing builds effectively toward the climactic encounter with the wounded caribou. The description of the animal - blood-matted, fly-covered despite the cold, yet moving with deliberate purpose - creates a genuinely unsettling image that transcends normal wildlife behavior into something supernatural. The ending, with JT following despite his better judgment, provides a strong hook while maintaining the story's psychological ambiguity.
The prose maintains an appropriate balance between accessible narrative and atmospheric description. Phrases like "fog so thick JT could barely see the truck from the porch steps" and "taillights swallowed by fog" create vivid imagery without becoming overwrought. The writing shows restraint in its horror elements, building dread through implication rather than explicit supernatural events.
Some minor weaknesses include occasional reliance on familiar horror tropes (the mysterious local guide warning outsiders to leave) and moments where the foreshadowing becomes slightly heavy-handed. However, these elements are executed well enough to feel purposeful rather than clichéd.
The piece successfully maintains the established tone while advancing the plot and deepening the mystery. The supernatural elements remain ambiguous enough to preserve the psychological uncertainty that makes the horror effective.
[Scores]
Adherence to Instructions: 18
Believable Character Actions: 17
Nuanced Characters: 16
Consistent Voice/Tone of Writing: 18
Imagery and Descriptive Quality: 17
Elegant Prose: 16
Emotionally Engaging: 17
Emotionally Complex: 15
Coherent: 18
Meandering: 3
Weak Dialogue: 2
Tell-Don't-Show: 4
Unsurprising or Uncreative: 5
Amateurish: 3
Purple Prose: 2
Overwrought: 3
Incongruent Ending Positivity: 1
Unearned Transformations: 2
Well-earned Lightness or Darkness: 17
Sentences Flow Naturally: 17
Overall Reader Engagement: 17
Overall Impression: 17
Scores: Adherence to Instructions: 18.0, Believable Character Actions: 17.0, Nuanced Characters: 16.0, Consistent Voice/Tone of Writing: 18.0, Imagery and Descriptive Quality: 17.0, Elegant Prose: 16.0, Emotionally Engaging: 17.0, Emotionally Complex: 15.0, Coherent: 18.0, Meandering: 3.0, Weak Dialogue: 2.0, Tell-Don't-Show: 4.0, Unsurprising or Uncreative: 5.0, Amateurish: 3.0, Purple Prose: 2.0, Overwrought: 3.0, Incongruent Ending Positivity: 1.0, Unearned Transformations: 2.0, Well-earned Lightness or Darkness: 17.0, Sentences Flow Naturally: 17.0, Overall Reader Engagement: 17.0, Overall Impression: 17.0